Ver Beek Blog

Our young family battling stage IV breast cancer one day at a time
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Enjoy today, look forward to tomorrow….

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I am so tired.  Like extreme exhaustion that you hope a good night of sleep would take care of, but it doesn’t.  Last night the thought of carrying Max upstairs to bed was overwhelming.  I was ready to let him sleep on the floor by me until I went to bed.   I know this is due to low blood counts from chemo.  Also, for some reason my back is killing me.  I don’t know why, but it is so sore.   Mainly my low back.  I hope it’s not my kidneys.  Must have something to do with chemo.   Who knows.

Other than being tired and my washing machine breaking, the past few days have been good.  I am so thankful for a dad who can do anything like fix a washing machine – thanks Dad!  I’ll have to write him a thank you.  He’s not techy at all.  He doesn’t have email and doesn’t know how to access the internet.  I’ll send him a note by pigeon courier.   

We had a great morning.  Brooke crawled into our bed this morning and said “so how’s the cancer doing mama?”  “It’s still there.”  I said.  “oh…I wish it wasn’t.”  was her response.  She is too cute.  We had monkey bread for breakfast (thank you Denise and MainDish in GR) which made for a great start to the day. 

The question of the day is if I still have my hair.  As of this moment I do.  I’m seriously considering shaving it today.  I have this crazy fear that clumps of my hair are going to fall out of my head when I’m in public.  Like at church or Meijer.  I don’t want to scare small children.  

Everyone else seems to be amazed at our faith during this time.  Some of you know our story and some don’t.  For those of you who know please skip this paragraph.  For those who want to know, here is a brief recap.  We owned a small baby furniture store in Holland for four years.  I got pregnant February of 2008 with twins and was severely sick from February to October 2008.  The store was neglected for those months and the economy was also failing.  I went into labor, Max was born naturally and Samantha wouldn’t come out.  Her placenta started to come loose (placenta abruption) and we had to do an emergency c-section.  We lost her at some point while traveling from the delivery room to the operating room.  The doctor’s worked on her, brought her back to life and she was immediately transported to DeVos.  She spent nine days in DeVos making a miraculous recovery.  She went from severely brain damaged the first night to laughing, jabbering and almost crawling as of today.  The day we took her home was also Brooke’s fifth birthday.  That night we put Brooke to bed and I hemorrhaged and was taken back to the hospital.  After fluids and a blood transfusion I returned home very weak and tired.  That was 7 months ago.   After things calmed down a bit, we decided to close our store mainly because of our family.  After the birth of the twins we realized how precious children are and we want to be there for them.   Another reason was the economy.  So we closed the store two months ago.  A few weeks ago I was diagnosed with breast cancer so here I am. 

So, like I said everyone wonders about our faith having been through so much in such a short amount of time.  Our marriage seems to get stronger and our family (immediate and extended) seems to get closer.  True colors have come out in our friendships and I must say we have great friends because the support is overwhelming.  You would think the opposite.  You’d think it would strain a marriage or take a toll on the family.  There are times, believe me, that not everything is awesome, but for the most part we hit the rally button and go forward.  I believe the only reason this happens is because of the incredible faith we, our family and friends have.  It’s been passed from generation to generation and runs deep.  It’s a faith that you know is always there even when you’re young and a moron, but you really tap into it when you’re grown and are so glad the seeds were planted when you were young.  You guys are praying for us – our marriage, our family, my cancer, etc. and God is answering prayers.   THANK YOU!

So I am going to enjoy today, look forward to tomorrow and pretend that Wednesday (chemo day) isn’t coming.  😉

28 Responses to “Enjoy today, look forward to tomorrow….”

  1. Holly says:

    Your post gave me goosebumps!!! So awesome that you are doing good! Praise the Lord! Thank you Lord for answered prayer!

  2. Lindy-
    It is great that you are doing well. Enjoy every moment of it. I will keep praying!

  3. CARL M says:

    Great attitude! When we were in football ( or any sport) the coach’s always wrote stuff on the blackboard. One that always stuck with me is ” What the mind believes, the body will achieve” Alot of truth in that one ( or a least I think so). If your hair is coming out no matter what, beat the cancer to the punch and do it yourself, your still the boss of you. O.K. maybe a little overly dramatic, but you get it. Thinking of you and Dusty and the little ones always. LOVE

  4. barb says:

    faith…it keeps growing as we see an active/present Jesus:)
    I see Him in Brooke….I see Him in His love for the twins..I see Him in the hands that made the monkey bread..I see Him in your dad coming in to fix..I see Him in your mom, His servant loving you up:) I see Him in Dusty..and in you as you take feeling good moments and enjoy them..
    His love is wrapped around you and I pray He lifts you up and surrounds you with His peace…In His Grip..barb

  5. Jana Ver Beek says:

    I had a great time with Brooklyn today. Hearing her squeel and laugh at the top of her lungs is great. When we said our prayer before lunch, she prayed for the cancer to go away. AMEN to that little sister!! She has the faith of one far more advanced in years. She will remember all the good people are doing for your family right now and someday she will think it is very natural to do good for others.
    Love you all! Jana

  6. Aunt Shirley says:

    Hi Lindy,
    I am so glad God blessed you with a good day. We will be in prayer for Wednesday and He may just give you another blessing of a pretty good day (we can only pray). Enjoy those babies, Brooklyn and Dusty and well – all your friends and family. Aren’t they the biggest blessings in life. Have a Blessed Sabbath tomorrow. Love you all.

  7. Aunt Pam says:

    I’m so glad you had a good couple of days and that you have the attitude of “I can do this!”. I recently read a saying, “As christians….clouds are but the shadows of God’s wings”. WOW, any way we look at it, either under His wings or in His hands, God is in control and He will take care of you. We had such a good time with Brooklyn and Gina at the Aquatic Center last week. She is a sweet young lady! Praying for all of you.

  8. Lisa Dykgraaf says:

    Thanks for the updates and sharing your story with us. You are truly an inspiration! Keep the strong faith and positive attitude. Praying for all of you!

  9. Chris Lowe says:

    Sorry we haven’t kept in touch. I got your email. Hard to read “is there anything we can do” coming from you…but we appreciate it. All is well for the moment, but Izzy will have to have surgery in the coming days. Through our seemingly small trials, your faith and perseverance continue to encourage us. We continue to lift all of you up in prayer, and apologize that it is not more us asking what we can do for you. We celebrate with you on your good days and continue to ask God for the rough ones to seem shorter. Can’t fix washing machines, but if you need anything else, holler.

    In Him,
    The Lowes

  10. Ron Boersema says:

    From Psalm 145 (The whole Psalm is worth reading..of course)
    Great Is the Lord
    [1] A Song of Praise. Of David.

    145 I will extol you, my God and King,
    and bless your name forever and ever.
    2 Every day I will bless you
    and praise your name forever and ever.
    3 Great is the Lord, and greatly to be praised,
    and his greatness is unsearchable.
    4 One generation shall commend your works to another,
    and shall declare your mighty acts.

    In Christ, Ron

  11. Amy & Brent Sluiter says:

    Thank you for sharing your story which so powerful points to God’s Amazing Faithfulness!
    “Great is Thy faithfulness… Morning by morning new mercies I see… Strength for today and bright hope for tomorrow! Great is Thy faithfulness, Lord, unto me.”

  12. Joy Koning says:

    Hi Lindy…It was great to see you in church! I pray that your back feels better and that you have lots of energy today. You looked great and I thought how brave and strong you were for being there. We continue to pray for you constantly.

  13. amy colthorrp says:

    Lindy- I am a friend of your new pastor and his wife. He emailed me your link:) Reading through your blog brought some memories of my past year (2008) When/if your ever bored, my story is found at The title is “colthorpnews”

    Three things come to mind:
    1. If you haven’t done so already, you will know when to shave your hair. Mine started falling out on day 16, but not in clumps. I could pull the hair out and it didn’t hurt. Best advice I received was to use a lint roller on all the little hairs left over after you’ve shaved.

    2. Biotene Mouthwash really helped with my mouth sores during chemo.

    3. had the best head covers that I found. I wish I had tried them on at a boutique and then ordered from headcovers. Cheaper and more color choices especially if you only order once.

    If you would ever like to chat, either by email or phone, please do not hesitate. My daughter was 2 and I had and infant son while completing chemo. That exhausting you speak of is unexplainable but I understand.

    God Bless-
    616 452-8531

  14. Amy Machiela says:


    You are truly an inspiration. I created and lit a luminaria at the American Cancer Society Relay for Life in your honor this past weekend.

    Our prayers for you and your family continue daily. You never walk alone.

  15. Julie Meyers says:

    “While I’m Waiting” by John Waller

    I’m waiting
    I’m waiting on you Lord
    I am hopeful
    I’m waiting on you Lord
    The wait is painful
    but patiently I will wait
    I will move ahead bold and confident
    taking every step in obedience

    While I’m waiting, I will serve you
    While I’m waiting, I will worship
    While I’m waiting, I will not fade
    I’ll be running the race
    even while I wait

    I’m waiting
    I’m waiting on you Lord
    I am peaceful
    I’m waiting on you Lord
    though it’s not easy,
    but faithfully I will wait
    yes I will wait

  16. Julie Meyers says:

    Hey Lindy,
    I was talking to Nel’s brother, Steve’s, girlfriend and her mom is still being treated for breast cancer. She told me the best place her mom found for wigs was at a place in the upstairs of Breton Village Mall (corner or Burton & Breton in Grand Rapids). I know it’s a hike for you…but, she said the lady fits them really good to your head shape and her mom was so happy with it. So…just wanted to pass that on. 🙂

    I’ll be thinking of you tomorrow with chemo…praying it goes well. Oh, and I saw your mom tonight…it was so good to see her! She got to see Elsie too, so that was fun. She looks good…she’s so sweet. I’m praying for them too.

    luv ya!

  17. Jana Ver Beek says:

    Praying that all goes well today, Lindy. You’re in my thoughts 24/7! Love, Jana

  18. Jill Graves says:

    I hope today goes well for you. Let me know if you need anything tomorrow morning.

  19. Barb Dannenberg says:

    Lindy, I think of you SO often and always offer up a prayer for you, for Dusty, for your children and for your parents. Thanks so much for keeping us updated via this blog – it really helps to know what to pray for.

  20. Amy & Brent Sluiter says:

    Praying for you today Lindy. Hope this round of chemo goes better and doesn’t make you sick. Praying you can feel God’s presence and peace surrounding you and your family today! Lots of love, Amy

  21. Julie Meyers says:

    just thought I’d share a blog with you…came across it – friend of a friend….

    I hope you can find some comfort in this…

    praying for you today…hoping & praying that I’ll hear on your next blog entry that your chemo went well!!

  22. Aunt Sylvia and Uncle Ken says:

    Praying for you today(and everyday)

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