Archive for 9. July 2009

Okay Today

I am doing much better today.  No nausea.  No pills.  No fluids today.  Just a blood draw.  I slept last night.  I’m so tired.  I can do tired.  I have twins.  Tired is nothing. 

I don’t have anything new to update you with.  Just going through the ins and outs of cancer and chemo.  Wishing I had a fast forward button so this could all be behind us. 

I have realized lately how this is affecting Brooklyn.  This is hard for adults to deal with so it’s gotta be tough for a 5-year-old.  She was crying the other day that she wants her mama back.  Having people in the house to help with Brooke, Max and Samantha is such a blessing, but it’s really different for her.  She said she wants me to take her to Captain Sundae, swimming, the park, make her lunch, and not other people.  Basic stuff.  I explained that I will someday soon and that right now I’m fighting cancer.  She asked if cancer was fighting me back and I said yes, cancer and I are in a fight right now, but I’m going to win.   Because I will.  I’m going to win. 

I caught her giggling at my bald head the other day.  I’m glad I can still make her laugh.  :) 

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